Remember those days when you’d wake up at 3am to a screaming baby? Yeah, so do I. Those were the pits. I would like to say that I have successfully ‘trained’, for lack of a much better word, my daughter to NOT wake me up when she awakes at the crack of dawn on the weekends.
Of course, during the week trying to wake Haydan up is like trying to fit a hippopotamus through a pinhole but during the weekend…well that is an entirely different story. It is as if she has this SURGE of energy at 6:00AM and needs to share it with the world.
After MANY weekends of us telling her ‘PLEASE just let us sleep another hour’, we finally have a program down. She now wakes up on the weekend and turns the TV on and watches TV until we wake up. Occasionally she will grab a snack out of the snack cabinet–but what do I care if she is chowing down on popcorn at 6AM on a Saturday? If it means I can get a couple extra BLISSFUL minutes of sleep–I really don’t care. As long as she isn’t into the liquor cabinet or inviting Justin Bieber over–we are good. Well, then today happened:
I woke up this morning just a few moments after Justin. I came out and did my regular routine of running straight to the coffee pot. Everyone knows not to talk to me until i’ve at least had a few sips of my creamer with a dash of coffee.
Justin came over to me and said ‘Guess what Haydan did this morning?’…. ‘WHAT DID SHE DO?!’ I ran into the living room and all seemed normal…aside from a pile of empty snack wrappers accumulating in the living room, which, as I said before, is TOTALLY fine seeing I get those few extra minutes of sleep.
‘She decided to rent a movie this morning’ he said. ‘How the hell did she do that?’ I replied. ‘No, Ash, it gets better—She actually found a way to rent a movie from a station in ANOTHER COUNTRY.’ I immediately started laughing. Then I thought/said ‘Wait, WHAT KIND OF MOVIE?!!’ Justin assured me it wasn’t something inappropriate (I knew I should have set up those kid controls on the TV). He continues, “She somehow found a way to watch a movie about a knight and it must have looked like a really damn good movie because she rented it and confirmed the purchase total of $10.99!!!’
I laughed. Really hard. That is all I did. What the fuck else do we get for training our kid to wake up by herself and not wake us up? We woke up and our child had already spent $11 before the 9:00 hour. I am actually pretty impressed. I said to Justin ‘Well, thankfully it wasn’t some porno or anything’ to which he replied ‘Actually, a porno movie probably would have cost us less.’ HA!
I really should be focusing on the good here– I mean, she didn’t wake us up–she got herself dressed (we won’t go into that interesting outfit choice), she got her exercise in by skipping some rope, and she seemed to successfully paint her nails as well.
I’ve created quite the independent little woman.
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I may just even let you charge my credit card for an international film too!!!