With Father’s Day around the corner and my seeing QUITE a few awesome items on the internet, I have decided to put together a DINORIFFIC Father’s Day Gift Guide. You can thank me later.
1. This. I really don’t think it needs much explaining. What man wouldn’t want a crocheted banana hammock? I could totally see my husband, “Barb the Dude”, rocking this out at the local community pool. I haven’t yet settled on a color, although, he does look good in blue.
2. A Man Purse AKA “The Carry All”. I love handbags, however, I have realized that the larger the size, the larger detriment to me. My mom gifted me with this beautiful Kate Spade tote for Christmas and I love it because it is large enough to fit my laptop when I travel. However, that means it is also large enough for my husbands wallet, his arsenal of keys that he carries around, and any other shit he doesn’t want to carry when we are out. So, if you face the same problems, buy you’re husband a purse! I mean, a “carry-all.”
3. FIVE TWO DOLLAR BILLS FOR ONLY $24.99!! What husband wouldn’t want ten dollars that you spent $24.99 on? Exactly. Even better? You can purchase these on your huusband’s Amazon Prime card! SEE?! I’m NOT just a hat rack!
4. Cookin’ With Coolio: 5 Star Meals at a 1 Star Price. Regardless if your man is handy in the kitchen, this book has to be good. I mean, the title alone makes me want to buy this for my husband. My husband happens to be good in the kitchen but I think he could “Gangsta Paradise” up our meals a bit, ya feel me?
5. You could buy your husband a fake dime bag. Alright, it’s actually something called “Mugwart’ and I learned this because I am obsessed with the show “Weeds” and I always wondered what they were smoking in all the scenes where they’re supposed to be “smoking weed.” I did a bit of research and found out that in many scenes, they are actually smoking stuff that looks like marijuana/tobacco, but really isn’t. I cannot say for sure that they smoked this stuff, but I remember something about mushroom root and herbal tobacco. This is actually completely unrelated to Father’s Day and would probably be an asshole gift to give to your husband, but it would be equally as awesome. Maybe you could tie this to the bow on the gift? Sort of like a stocking stuffer at Christmas time? No?
6. CIGARS! Let’s be honest, cigars smell SO good. I’ve never been able to smoke a cigar successfully because I always end up inhaling, but there is something really sexy about men and women smoking a cigar. I see someone smoking a cigar and I instantly think “BADASS!” These cigars are great because they come in this awesome box (boxes are easy to wrap) and are called “Davidoff Nicaraguan Cigars.” The name alone sounds manly and sexy and makes me think of David Beckham. Wait… But really, cigars make a fine gift for any occasion, especially Father’s Day. Just picture your man on Father’s Day sitting on the backyard adirondack with his feet perched up with a cold brewski in one hand and one of these fine cigar’s in the other.
7. UHHH, this shirt! I am about 99% sure my husband would love this…maybe with that 1% of him not liking it being REALLY strong. However, pajamas also make a really good gift and if he didn’t like it, he could always use it as a shirt to sleep in! OR, I could… See? I think ahead!
8. THIS AMAZING TOWEL! I can already imagine that most men would think this is awesome and would gladly prance around in it after their morning showers. It’s just an added bonus that I also think this is AH-MAZING.
9. This AWESOME shower gel dispenser. I only say “awesome” because I don’t share a bathroom with Justin because there’s only a shower in the master and I prefer the tub—SOOO, he could have this bad boy all to himself in the shower. And, be honest, that’s fucking funny.
10. And lastly, if you don’t like your husband, you should get him these.
Based off the reviews, he will get your point. Here are a sample of some of the Amazon reviews:
And, there you have it! Smash’s Father’s day Gift Guide! I hope my guide has helped aide in the perfect Father’s Day gift, or array of gifts! And again, you.are.welcome.
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