I scan my newsfeed like the rest of you lovies everyday. I see the happy faces of my family in photos at recent BBQ’s, birth announcements of my friends growing families, the latest celebrity break-ups (still weeping over Jennifer Garner and Ben Affleck), and then, sometimes, I come across some really obscure shit.
The latest “obscure shit” to hit my newsfeed was this article. Feel free to read it and watch the video, or, I can provide you a visual and you can get the idea real quick.
You Tell Em’, Molly! BRAVO!!
The latest trend to hit the internet is a slew of new “fitness challenges,” with accompanying hashtags of #CollarboneChallenge, #BikiniBridge, #BellyButtonChallenge, and the #ThighGap. I read the article, watched the video, and viewed the above picture/s and was hit square in the jaw. The most disturbing part of this entire ordeal is the fact that people are, in some convoluted way, correlating this to “fitness.”
What.The.Fuck.
I sat and looked at this photo for quite some time. A lot of emotions ran through my head, and just as I was sitting there looking, I hollered for my husband to come in and look. “That is disgusting.” were the first words out of his mouth.
And, I couldn’t agree more.
This is what we’ve defined as “beautiful,” and even more shocking, “FIT.”
I know that the majority of you who follow my blog are wise enough to know that bones protruding from your body does not a “fit” person make. Yes, some people are naturally born with curvier frames than others, and vice versa. God thought it would be funny to give me no boobs and knock knees, so, I roll with it and laugh along with Him.
However, this shit is disturbing. Like, REALLY fucking disturbing.
I decided to take matters into my own hands and show you just how ridonkulous this really is:
I shall replace the #CollerboneChallenge with the #HotDogChallenge
The #BikiniBridge is now replaced by the #FrenchFriesAreDeliciousBridge
The #BellyButtonChallenge I’ve conveniently replaced with the #JustEatAFuckingDoughnutChallenge
And lastly, the #ThighGap, well, I’ll leave this one open to suggestions. I chose mint chip ice cream to perfect my #ThighGap, but I’ll let you guys decide what best suits you. I wanted to do #PineappleGap, but I couldn’t find a pineapple and let’s be honest, a pineapple between the legs could be dangerous.
These photos are completely dedicated to pointing out the insane standards put on “beauty” and a woman’s body. And now, sadly, a disturbing definition of what some actually deem identifiable as “fit.” None of those hashtags or standards are “beautiful” and none of this is “healthy.” To tell someone that their bones protruding through their body translates to “healthy” or “fit,” well, they deserved to be knocked upside the head. EveryBODY is different. Every human is curved and shaped differently and it saddens me to think that my daughter has to grow up in a world where this crap sets the bar for “beautiful, fit, and healthy.”
Friends, don’t buy into this shit. There are a million and one ways to lead a healthy lifestyle, and I’ll be the first to tell you that it isn’t listening to some quack, or MULTIPLE quacks, tell you that balancing a roll of coins on your neck or a “bridged bikini” waistline defines you as healthy, beautiful, or “fit.”
Give a big “FUCK YOU” to the ridiculous standards set for women, and do your friend a favor and give a vote by clicking the brown banner below while doing so.
You are all beautiful, especially if you can balance a french fry on your stomach. 😉
Love,
Smash
You are a genius my friend! I love this and agree with you so-to-the-much Love it!
Just when I do thinkin can love ya more you do this! Awesome piece! And my little contribution about this latest bull shit…. Be happy to be you, fuck all these insane, body shaming impossible assholey challenges!!
AMEN, SISTA!! Preach! Thank-you so much, lovey. MWAH! xoxo
You are my favorite person. Like ever!
I love you so much. OMG you crack my shit up!
I want to make some sort of comment about how it frightens me that this is what people do with their time and emotional energy, BUT I really can’t judge. I waste both of those things all the time. So I’ll just echo your WTF REALLY?! about all of this. How weird. Is the belly button thing that you’re supposed to be able to reach around and touch it? Hold on. I’m so confused, I have to scroll up and look at the photos.
Bloody hell, I just tried to do that (sitting in a cafe) and hit my elbow in a place that hurts. And I got NO WHERE near my belly button. Psh.
I’d rather be beautiful on the inside, thankyouverymuch.
Yay! Sing it, sister x
AAAAAHHHHHH. I LOVE YOU FOR THIS POST! So so so so much.
Can I get in on the hotdog challenge?! We need to make this a thing. For real.
I totally think we should. Let’s organize SOMETHING awesome like this. Hotdogs, cheeseburgers, ANYTHING.
I can balance a hot dog in my mouth! Really though…I saw on the TODAY show a couple of weeks ago that the #bellybuttonchallenge can be physically dangerous. Ugh. Some people. This is why we can’t have nice things.
I just peed a little. Thank you.
You’re awesome. I love the facial expressions. And the fuck you’s to people who think that shit is awesome.
THIS is EPIC. I love your irreverent humor and nonchalant way flipping the bird to horrible trends that wreck female form and distort healthy ideals. Bravo! You are marvelous, Smash!! <3
Classic double-standard. You get to body-shame skinny people… and then promote an unhealthy diet? How does that help people who are already suffering from body issues and eating disorders?
Yeah. You’re a real hero for promoting #JustEatAFuckingDonutChallenge when obesity (and type 2 diabetes) has become a certifiable epidemic. You completely missed the point because the article you linked to specifically says:
Gee, don’t want to mess around with silly stuff like, I dunno, education or watching out for tell-tale signs of a mental disorder like bulimia or anorexia. Nope. “Hashtags are the enemy! Fuck skinny people! Fuck diet challenges because fat people feel uncomfortable! *OMF NOM NOM NOMF*”
So glad I got to get my daily dose of moral authority from someone who completely misses the point about the dangers of eating disorders and unhealthy foods.
Moron.
Why hello there. I am so glad you popped by! It appears that YOU have missed the mark. I specifically stated “These photos are completely dedicated to pointing out the insane standards put on “beauty” and a woman’s body. And now, sadly, a disturbing definition of what some actually deem identifiable as “fit.” None of those hashtags or standards are “beautiful” and none of this is “healthy.” To tell someone that their bones protruding through their body translates to “healthy” or “fit,” well, they deserved to be knocked upside the head. EveryBODY is different. Every human is curved and shaped differently and it saddens me to think that my daughter has to grow up in a world where this crap sets the bar for “beautiful, fit, and healthy.”
The post was somewhat satire based, yes. Do we shove doughnuts, fries, and ice cream down our throats in our home everyday? NO. Moderation is key, and I am aware of that. However, I was trying to make a point. Those photos are NOT the definition of beauty, healthy, or fit.
My motivation to #JustEatAFuckingDoughnut was based on the fact that they are…well, delicious, not based on ones appearance assuming I think they/someone needs to eat one.
As you said “anorexia exists, so I’ll combat diet challenges by stuffing my face with hotdogs and fries” —-Yes, i did that. For THIS post. Again, to make a point that bones protruding from ones body does NOT a healthy person make.
It was an approach to stab this disgusting trend with a bit of humor, while still making a point that these standards/challenges/trends do not represent “health/beauty/fitness.” They are gross. And sad.
And yes, I do think those hashtags are the enemy (#CollarboneChallenge, #BikiniBridge, etc.) because they were to be taken seriously by others who saw them. Mine, clearly, WERE NOT. And “Fuck skinny people?” and your mention of my “skinny shaming”? I’m 5’6 and weigh 117lbs. I think it was PRETTY clear i was not shaming anyone—except the idiots that came up with these unrealistic trends to measure an individuals “health, beauty, and level of fitness”
Thanks for stopping by. I don’t know your name, but as you so nicely called me, I’ll shall sign this. Love, “Moron”
Yes…I think I can handle those challenges. Very well said!
This!
This is the most beautiful thing that I have seen in a LONG ass time! Thank you!