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Respecting My Child’s Boundaries

August 14, 2016 by Ashley Alteman 4 Comments

Respecting My Child’s Boundaries

Respecting My Child’s Boundaries: When my daughter was a toddler, she was fond of giving big, sloppy kisses on your mouth- or your ear, cheek, foot… Really, the kid was a smooching machine and I loved every minute of it. I loved her tiny lips pressed against mine as she demanded: “One more kiss, Mumma! Mummmaaa! […]

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Filed Under: Barb Marley, Smash Says!, This Is Life

6 Types of People You Don’t Need In Your Life

August 1, 2016 by Ashley Alteman 2 Comments

6 Types of People You Don’t Need In Your Life

6 Types of People You Don’t Need In Your Life: Some of life’s greatest gifts are the relationships you form throughout your years on Earth. It’s always good to have a friend who understands you inside out and upside down, or a family member who understands your humor and can laugh with you during the good […]

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Filed Under: Smash Says!, This Is Life

This Is Beauty

July 17, 2016 by Ashley Alteman 14 Comments

This Is Beauty

First there was the “thigh gap.” Then came the “bikini bridge,” the “bellybutton challenge,” and the “collarbone challenge.” In March of this year, the “A4 Challenge” popped up– which apparently is some bizarre trend where women (and men) hold a piece of paper to their waste to show that….they can hide behind it? I have no fucking […]

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Filed Under: Smash Says!, This Is Life

“You’re So Lucky To Have a Husband Like That!”

June 23, 2016 by Ashley Alteman 10 Comments

“You’re So Lucky To Have a Husband Like That!”

“You hit the husband JACKPOT!” “WHAT!? He does LAUNDRY?!” “Your husband knows how to cook?!” “Is he babysitting the little one while you’re out?” “You’re so lucky to have a husband like that!” — These are all things that have been said to me since I’ve been married to my partner and husband, Justin. Yes, […]

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Filed Under: Smash Says!, This Is Life

Mr. Roger Jimenez, You Do Not Speak For Christians

June 19, 2016 by Ashley Alteman 3 Comments

Mr. Roger Jimenez, You Do Not Speak For Christians

49 lives were taken by a single gunman on Sunday, June 12th, 2016, leaving us in a state of devastation. As many of us pray for the individuals and families affected by this heinous act of evil, many are speaking up with encouraging words of support, love, and condolences. Blood banks are holding blood drives […]

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Filed Under: Smash Says!, This Is Life

Brock Turner’s Name Can Light Up My Timeline

June 8, 2016 by Ashley Alteman 7 Comments

Brock Turner’s Name Can Light Up My Timeline

With the election upon us, it’s not infrequent to see updates from our friends via social media with lists of things they’d prefer not to hear about anymore. I.e. “Things I’d like to never hear about again: Gorillas, Donald Trump and Parenting Styles.”  However, I’ve now seen some posts around the web tossing the Brock […]

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Filed Under: Smash Says!, This Is Life

Lay Off The Millennial Generation

May 30, 2016 by Ashley Alteman 3 Comments

Lay Off The Millennial Generation

Lately, I’ve seen a lot of Millennial bashing around the web. The Millennial Generation, per Wikipedia, are those born somewhere between 1980 and early 2000. Born in 1984, I am one of the Millennial Generation. We’ve been described as lazy, narcissistic, coddled, idiots who don’t know what the real world looks like, nor know anything about money, […]

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Filed Under: Smash Says!, This Is Life

Dear Walmart Food Stamp Hater,

May 10, 2016 by Ashley Alteman 7 Comments

Dear Walmart Food Stamp Hater,

Dear Walmart Food Stamp Hater, I caught the video you starred in this week at your local Walmart and I must say, I’m really disappointed. I wish I could say I am disappointed in your acting skills, but the sad truth is, you weren’t acting. It was clear when you waved to the camera that […]

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Filed Under: Smash Says!, This Is Life

My Psychiatrist’s Waiting Room

May 5, 2016 by Ashley Alteman 4 Comments

My Psychiatrist’s Waiting Room

Every time I walk into the psychiatry office waiting room, a deja vu chill shoots down my spine. Upon entering, there is a large sign taped to the door that makes it abundantly clear that we are not to photograph anything/anyone in the office. I want to write in Sharpie marker, just below the sign: […]

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Filed Under: Smash Says!, This Is Life

OH, YOU BLOGGERS!

April 24, 2016 by Ashley Alteman 3 Comments

OH, YOU BLOGGERS!

“Oh, your internet friends?” “Hey, ‘Facebook!’ How’s it hangin’?” “Oh, you BLOGGERS!” These are all phrases that have jokingly been shot in my direction since I’ve become a writer/blogger/teller-of-all-too-much. “I see your green light on! I know you’re on Facebook all the time!” 10-4, Stalker McStalkerson. Allow me to let you in on a little […]

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Filed Under: Smash Says!, This Is Life

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